Are Guinea Pigs the Secret Manly Pet?
I know what you're thinking, no way. Literally don't be the most idiotic person that's ever come around. This sounds more ridiculous than something Donald Trump or anyone else would say but I would like my opportunity to argue my case. How on earth can a guinea pig be a secretly manly pet? Surely they say that a dog is a mans best friend for a reason.
Look at the little geezer all happy and fluffy. You know why that is? That's because he's just come into your home to be your latest manly man. That and he's just ate a tonne and excreted on your carpet. This is his home now and you need to look after him. You can't get one alone either, they're a herd animal. Not because they're prey but because they're a social soul who love a good time. OK so why not get two? How hard can it be? Then again you getting two guys means they're going to be proper guys and have a brawl all the time as they try to dominate who's left over carrot shavings they are. Alternatively you get a female Guinea Pig, what I like to call a piglette, and you're little man is going to be having many wild nights and you'll be having an army of baby piggies on your hand. Fine, you'll have to go down the two female Guinea Piglette route and just hope they get along. You may think I'm saying this all as a negative point but I think this just adds to the attraction and allure of a Guinea Pig, definitely a pet with character and attitude.
I'm not knocking other pets, I'm an animal fan and you can't beat the feeling a pet gives you when you come home from a hard day at work or need a friend. For example dogs live for their owners and beam whilst they walk through the door. However if you want a low cost and effortless pet then why not jump on the Guinea Pig train? Put your guys or gals into their own little home and watch them enjoy life as a new member of your household. I am a happily taken man however I know with a Guinea Pig or two in my house it's going to raise her mood and take her mind off the fact I didn't do my dishes. You see what I mean? The Guinea Pig is already you're right hand man in avoiding a telling off. Alternatively for the single man you bring a girl back and she see's you have Guinea Pig's, you know how that's going to go down? Brilliantly. Think about it for a minute, you get back from the club with your lady and she comes into the house to a dog. Not a fan of dogs? Oh no, that's your night ruined. She comes in and you have a cat. She's got a cat allergy? Oh no, that's your night ruined. Fish are boring. Girls don't like rats tails. Snakes are a bit intense. Have you ever heard of a girl with a Guinea Pig allergy? No. Have you ever heard of a girl who doesn't want a Guinea Pig jumping up on her new dress? No, don't be daft. I assure you you'd be instantly cuter and more comfortable in your own body in her eyes. Girls don't want guys with overly large exhausts on their cars and an army buzz cut, they want a man with a Guinea Pig.
Not exactly sure if this will have convinced you to get yourself a Guinea Pig but I've actually convinced myself. At least that's something I guess? On a serious note however whatever pet you have please make sure you look after it and they'll look after you. I walked into Pets at Home today and saw the adoption pet section with a little Guinea Pig inside, Steve-o, who looked like a proper geezer. They're out there, you can get your own little wing man and companion in a heartbeat to enhance your everyday life into an extraordinary one.